Cindy Hoard

Inspirational Author and Psychologist

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The constant presence of depression leaves me always looking for additional meaning, understanding or insight into depression in my life. A constant illusion I lived with was “Do something and I can’t help but get and feel better!” This dilemma between doing and being was both my ally and my enemy. Over time, I realized that there was not anything I could do to tackle or get rid of the depression.

It is hard to “Just Be”
It was hard to “Just Be” when I was struck by an urgency to change my thinking. For years I was convinced that If I was not doing something or being productive, “Just Being” was a waste of time and certainly not proactive. This was a barrier to understanding the idea of being present in the moment.

What is different about “Just Being”
As I released into the realm of “Just Being,” I discovered it could be anything from experiencing nature, prayer, meditation, or simply being mindful of where I was or what I was feeling. Sometimes being present in the moment also meant being with the chaos of my thinking and living, which I didn’t realize was happening. When I am able can “Just Be” with full attention to the present moment, there are not expectations or demands for any kind of performance or accomplishment.

Shifting from my thinking to “Just Being”
I had to move from a conceptual understanding in my head, aka thoughts, to the emotional and physical experience in my gut. The shift let me engage in simple attention to sensations in my body and of my breath. There is so much less effort in staying in the intimacy of the moment. There are no demands, have-to-s, to-do’s – “just being.” Immersing in awareness can get rid of the need to label or judge thoughts as good or bad. I could be present to whatever was happening and just accept it without analysis. That is what it means to “Just Be.” My only focus is recognition and awareness of thoughts and sensations in “Now”. I don’t have to “Do” anything or respond at that time.

Regaining my sanity with “Just Being”
I have at times driven myself crazy on a never-ending journey of researching, reading, searching for insights, understanding and information about my depression and cancer. I knew that, if I learned enough, there were answers I could put together to come up with a solution. Depression required a whole different kind of wisdom, obtainable only through patiently waiting over an period. I had to just be in the present moment. For a long time, the idea of a concept or lesson out there that explained everything seemed like the only way to get answers, ideas, or directions to “get rid of” the depression. All of them were external!

The source of wisdom
The real wisdom lay in my internal experience and the degree of my ability to stay engrossed in the moment. Being does not require understanding, physical energy or description in words. When I stay open to awareness, I frequently experience wisdom without words.

Being instead of doing has been one of the greatest and hardest lessons of this whole journey. Over time, I was able to write extensively about it, because it was an everyday element of my meditation process of attempting to move along. The insight and glimpses of possibility were always there; it takes persistent vigilance and practice to hold on to them.

Of course, you eventually need to do something, but setting the scene by “Just Being” makes me fresh for whatever is next!

How can you “Just Be” in your life? Can you indulge in the present moment even briefly?

What are the sensations in your body when you are able to “Just Be?” I’d love to hear more about your experience as you try to Just Be. Please feel free to reply here or email me directly at Cindy@DrCindyAuthor.com.